Life is about managing expectations. If you were to ask, the majority of people would say that they care very much about how they are perceived and are always looking to improve. So why the sweaty palms when your boss says “Can we talk? I have some feedback I’d like to share with you.”How can we fix the perception of feedback?
- Change the Conversation: The Center for Creative Leadership (CCL) is well known for its model of Situation, Behavior, Impact (SBI). This method shifts the focus on feedback away from the person and focuses on the impact — positive or negative and the behaviors leading to the result. This approach works the majority of the time, with one caveat. If the receiver didn’t know or understand the behaviors they were supposed to exhibit and the results that were expected, then how can we hold them accountable? When we don’t set expectations for our people, we aren’t expressing feedback, we are revealing resentment which is our fault, not theirs.
- Create a culture of Trust: I love this definition of trust… it’s the ability to connect and listen without judgement. We can build trust by practicing the SBI model on a DAILY basis. Your team members (or clients) can’t read your mind! Be very clear about your expectations, the desired result and the process by which to achieve it.
- Open, Honest, Transparent Conversations: What if every conversation started with a common understanding of expectations by all parties and not with assumptions? Feedback shouldn’t be scary, it should be welcomed. If it happens every day and focuses on performance against clear expectations then plain and simple, it is a conversation. One based on trust and mutual respect. And better yet, if you take it to heart, you can change your behavior and ultimately it’s impact on others.
Embrace feedback and watch yourself grow as a leader!
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